Day 64...worries and stress

Worries and stress...two old familiar weights that I oh too willingly carry around on my shoulders. In fact, it often seems like I go looking for them!

Today was not an easy day. I woke up with more congestion then I had last night, and I had a pretty bad cough attack while I was at work that really did a number on my throat. It was also quite the challenge trying to deal with the class today. My lead was out today so we had a sub lead teacher. It was the same wonderful woman we had sub in our class before. Only, today didn't go as graceful as the last time. A huge handful of our class was buzzing with energy today that blocked every attempt to connect with the kids. The morning was a hopeless attempt to redirect, redirect, redirect. We were able to hook a few students with some works, but all in all, it was really hard to encourage focus for the day. The other complication was that it was dumping outside so our daily trip to the playground was canceled, dashing any hopes we had of our students running off their energy.

In the end, the day was at least somewhat manageable, but it really illustrated how much a change of staff and routine can completely throw off the class if even for just one day.

On the same lines of staff changes, one of the employees was let go due to a lack of enrollment in our school. Suddenly worries have flooded my mind! What if I had to be let go due to budget cuts? Could they let me go? Is my position very stable? Could all of my absents from illness mark me as unreliable and therefore replaceable? It's making me question all the days I have stayed home ill! But even then, we have had even more cases of illness crop up that make me feel all the more justified in watching out for my health and the health of others. What good would it do if I came in and got everyone else sick? And what good would it do me to keep challenging my immune system with the possible threat of swine flu floating around? I read an article today about swine flu...the numbers of infant and teen related deaths shakes me to the core. It is so horrible to think of, and it really does scare me. I could easily go on about the flu epidemic, but that would only cause me to worry and stress all the more. I just hope that my husband and I can stay safe and that, by the time we have Pickle, this wave of illness will have at least settled.

I don't want a Pickle pandemic.